Through Smoke by Needtobreathe

Before the truth will come to fill our eyes
The wool comes down in the form of fire
And when the answers and the truth have cut their ties
Will you still find me
Will you still see me through smoke, through smoke

I was born in a house in a town just like your own
I was raised to believe in the power of the unknown
'Cause when the answers and the truth take different sides
Will you still find me
Will you still see me through smoke
Through smoke (x3)

When their whispers have painted pictures that
Make you doubt what you once believed in
Paper stories that hide the glory

To keep us searching
Through smoke

Who do you believe when you can't get through (through smoke)
When everything you know seems so untrue (through smoke)
When I'm lost in a place that I thought I knew (through smoke)
Give me some way that I might find you (through smoke)

Who do you believe (through smoke)
Everything you know
When I'm lost in a place (through smoke)
Give me some way

Through Smoke by Needtobreathe

Where I'm From

I am from hole-digging,
from Future of Forestry ringtone,
and a Haitian sunburn.
I'm from a bedtime bible story,
a resisted goodnight kiss,
and an Afar magazine.

I am from far away places
that I have never been
but have visited in the expanse
of my mind.

I am from "do what makes you feel good"
Speak the painful truth
Cross a boundary
With a broken, capitalist father.

I am from a beautiful blonde
from Knows what she's talking about
Creativity adventure in new laughter.

I am from purpose
and resistance.
From a cold shower after work,
From Potok, Pamuk, and Robinson,
And from where did the time go now?

And I'm from salvation,
a new life each day.
I am from a global purpose.
I am from the kingdom of truth
on Earth.

Moksha

I know not me
I am not I
I am you
I am nothing
I am nothing tangible

Let go

We are each other,
eternally
I know the end,
And the beginning of everything
I, we, us, everything lifted higher.

Blessed holy light!
The soul beats the rhythm of the nations,
Combined into Majesty!
The divine made known to the Redeemed!

Holy eternity gives the touch of heaven
to the fallen, completed heart.

Praise Him.

LIfe

So I haven't been here in a while. And possibly that means I have been too busy doing more important things. Like living life. I don't think anyone really reads this blog unless I tell people I have written in it so I'm possibly relaying all of this therapeutically more than anything.

A recap of my family's and my life since January:

An earthquake in Haiti...Fear, Anxiety, Stress, Sadness
A new Child, Amanda...Sudden Change resulting in Stress, Adaptation
Courtney w/ Pneumonia-Fear, Stress, Panic
Courtney's Thyroid Removal-Stress, Fear, Uncertainty

I suppose that is a lot to go through in one month. But I am so thankful for God. It is because of him we can say "Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light" Micah 6:8

As a side note, I deleted Facebook today. My wife Courtney did the same thing last week and inspired me to do the same. It's strange what we feel strange about sometimes. Even though I was hardly on that site, I felt some odd hesitation about it. LIke I was losing something. I suppose that is a small taste of what the rich ruler might have felt if he would have given away his riches. Some odd remorse even though he would surely know his actions were based on sound principles.

Anyhow, until next time, whenever that will be.

Landon

Everyday, you have to say yes. Total Surrender! To be where he wants you to be. If he puts you on the street, and everything is taken from you, and suddenly you find yourself in the street, to accept to be on the street at that moment, not for you to put yourself in the street, but to accept to be put there. This is the difference.

To Accept!

If God wants you to be int eh Palace, well then to accept to be in the Palace, so long as you are not choosing to be in the Palace. This is the difference. This is what made the difference, in total surrender. To accept whatever He givees and to give whatever it takes with a big smile.

This is the surrender to God!

To accept to be cut to pieces, yet each piece belonging only to Him. To accept the people that come, and the work that you happen to do. Today, maybe you have a meal. And tomorrow, you maybe have nothing. Maybe there's no water in the well.

To Accept!

And to give whatever it takes. It takes your good name, it takes your good health. It takes "yes": That is the surrender.

And then you are free.

-Mother Teresa

Martyrdom

...nd we were only trying to make it. I don't quite know where the time went, but we lost for winning.
Forcing our steps into silence was pointless,
Stone upon stone we trod and shame brought up the rear.
Windows opened, windows slammed shut
As a futile attempt to somehow shut out their disgrace.
We couldn't see anything anyway.
So what's the difference?
I guess they were wrong
When they said God would make our blindness into sight.
No matter, the landscape is different now anyway.
Our feet feel the timbers creaking beneath us.
What else can we say?
We will go only to pave a stony path for the next fatal few
In hope that the path will lead them,
Lead them anywhere but here, to this type of de...
Amen.

It has been a long while since I have posted here. I guess it is because life has been so busy. Between my last post and this one I have gone to Haiti, prepared and had an incredible wedding to an incredible woman, and started a new semester working 26-32 hours a week, taking 15 hours in classes. Life is running, to say the least.

I've written one poem and I threw it away. And nothing else.

Here's something.

At first I thought I'd run away
but there's no sense in that.
I just freaked out and nothing more
and God was knocking on our door,
we decided and my jaw hit the floor.
I can't believe we chose that!
If there was a joy that could express
the one I feel right now then the world
would be a much, much better place.
Especially Haiti.