its times like this that people dont know about. the times we are here...just sitting here, just doing what we do and suddenly it happens. That feeling you have been feeling for weeks finally engulfs you. its then when you stop doing what you do...sit up..and you dont know what to do but cry. All the questions, those WHY questions, catch up to you. "Why am I here?" "Why did i/You choose this?" "Why him, why her, why them?" "Why cant i think clearly?" You realize that you arent happy. Not content. Even though you want to be. It feels like four walls are finally close enough to have you where they want you. Trapped in a tiny, little box. What life is this? And you cry.
I guess these times happen because God likes to see hope. Because in those tears, those small, obscure vessels of moisture, are prayers of hope. A longing. A reaching out for a hand. A small, quiet step forward. A small flare in the bitter darkness.
2 Corinthians 7:10-11
1 comment:
i really do hope that's what my tears hold. I cry and i'm unsure why, i feel unsure about being unsure and i feel everything is all wrong, when i know everything is right. i feel to weak to stand and I feel there is no one to go to to hug and to tell me it's all going to be okay. I long for the touch of someone's embrace, and feeling safe in someone's arms, even if i don't know them that well-- i feel like a child, who is desperate to lay her head on her mom's beating chest with her stroking her hair as the tears just come and i don't know how to end
but i really hope they find my luggage soon.
(ha nice ending, i know.)
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